“We're put here on Earth to learn our own lessons. No one can tell you what your lessons are; it is part of your personal journey to discover them. On these journeys we may be given a lot, or just a little bit, of the things we must grapple with, but never more than we can handle.” – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
As we close summer with Labor Day next week, I’ve been thinking about the lessons of the past six months of the pandemic, civil unrest and another political season of “you’re wrong and I’m right.” The issues that we face are complex, deeply rooted and won’t be solved with a slogan on a bumper sticker or sign. The sustainable answers are not found in extremes, in right or left. The answers lie first and foremost within each of us individually. If and when we realize this, we can begin working on the only person we can truly change – “me.”
When we loosen the grip of other people and our circumstances to provide and define our happiness, we begin to participate in our life, transforming from victim to victory day by day. Rather than pining, diminishing “others,” we can hear our own voice and make different decisions for a new future, not a mere repetition of the past.
Self-awareness offers us a choice to either add or distract, judge or accept, blame or respond with empathy. When we open up to learning our lessons, we can leave the same old mountain that we’ve been circling and move on to new mountains. Letting go of the familiar allows and invites growth and transformation.
In the past six months, we have introduced a new vocabulary. Essential and nonessential, social distancing, zoom fatigue, uncertain times, unprecedented, new normal, pivot and complicit. These concepts and realities have forever changed us. I continue to learn what’s essential and nonessential in my own life and have a desire to go deeper into meaning, possibility and purpose.
While social distancing, I’ve discovered the true value of relationships and connections. I am absolutely zoom fatigued and am beginning to weave walking meetings into my schedule. My left hip and low back are demanding it. And while every event that I planned to be at has been canceled, I am choosing to keep training for the Marine Corp Marathon and run it virtually in October. The training schedule and discipline keeps my mind focused from wandering into “poor me” territory of which there is no return and always ends up at a dead end.
By far, “uncertain times” has been commercialized and not only become hollow, it’s become irritating. While this time is uncertain and different than anything the world has experienced in recent history, we don’t need to buy a car to be reminded of it.
While we have no certain idea of what the next six months will bring, we can unleash our creativity, resilience and empathy to carry each other through to the other side. No short cuts on this journey. The human spirit has a tremendous capacity to rise above circumstances, to overcome and to create something new of this unbelievable year. There are lessons if we dare to enter the classroom.
In addition to running or walking every day, journaling, daily podcasts and reading have been vital to keeping an optimistic outlook amidst the consternation of this historic time. This week, I started the daily practice of meditation in the morning and evening using the Insight Timer app. It is making a noticeable difference.
While running, podcasts have also shifted my mindset. My two favorites are Cathy Heller’s Don’t Keep Your Day Job and Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic. Both podcasts broaden my perspective, inspire and make me think differently - the outcome of learning. Cathy Heller celebrated her 300th episode this past week and this episode has an array of highlights of her past interviews with the brightest minds. On my 13.5 mile training run today, I listened to the 10 Most Stoic Moments in History. The four stoic virtues are Wisdom, Courage, Temperance and Justice. If each of us practiced these daily, we could change the world.
As we transition to a new season, take time daily to reflect and think about lessons that you’ve learned. With a balanced perspective, we can create something meaningful and lasting from this year. Let’s keep moving to get to the other side both individually and as a whole. Start some daily practices to shift your attention, take action and apply your lessons to move forward. It’s back to school for all of us.
“We should not look back unless it is to derive useful lessons from past errors, and for the purpose of profiting by dearly bought experience.” – George Washington